Thursday, April 29, 2010

A Series of Awkward Embarassments

Here's the scene.... it's Thursday morning, I've been up since about 7:30, I'm still in my pajamas (Relient K shirt, gray sweats, no bra), wearing glasses, hair in a wonky side ponytail with the bangs pinned to the side. House is decently neat- lots of books on the table, cooked chicken on the stove cooling down to be put in the fridge for dinner, lots of shoes by the back door since we've been coming in and out from the garden. I'm leisurely thinking about making my way upstairs to get changed when the door bell rings.

Twice...

And no, it's not the postman.

It's a VERY good looking man, possibly early thirties, tan, pretty eyes, sandy blonde hair neatly cut, in black pants and a striped Oxford shirt.

"Hi, I'm Oliver... from Finders Keepers... here for the inspection... I hope you got a letter?"

I stare and then pull myself together. "Yeah, but I thought it's not until like May or something. It's been changed a few times..."

We awkwardly look at each other. "But yeah, you can definitely come in. It's not really that tidy in here but please, come in."

He comes in and explains that he's just replaced someone named Michelle and so that's probably the confusion in the date. But hopefully it's OK if he just looks around and takes a few pictures to send to the landlord? What am I going to do? Say no? Of course I let him in. I show him the broken microwave but otherwise, decently put together kitchen. We look at the living room and he asks who the Liverpool fan is. I tell him that we both are. We make some small talk about football. He looks out the back and asks if we have a mower. I tell him that I have no idea but he lets me know that lawn upkeep is our responsibility to either find a mower or hire one. Or rent a goat, as I mentioned. He laughed. Apparently I'm witty.

Then we go upstairs. My room is decent and we quickly leave. We have a discussion about light bulbs in the guest room where we can't seem to figure out why the bulb doesn't work (and then clearly dismantled the entire light). Luckily Oliver is tall and can take a closer look. He explains that the light need a three-pronged bulb and we have a two-pronged bulb. We need to look for a three-pronged bayonet, so I'm clearly learning a lot about light bulbs. We quickly look into my bathroom, open up the closets, see that there's a big box for a lawn mower on top of the water heater but we can't tell if it's got a mower in it or not. We assume not since I could move it around so I'll have to check the green bin outside later. Still, nice to be discovering things in the house.

Then we move onto Roni's room. He asks if there's a carpet. It's hard to tell because of all the clothes. He didn't really ask that, but I'm trying to make a point here. At this point, I am profusely apologizing for the state of the room. He makes the wise decision NOT to photograph her room. I agree. We escape back downstairs, he takes a few pictures and then we end up chatting for like fifteen minutes. I don't know how we got about to chatting but we talked football, American football, sports, head, neck and spinal cord injuries, difficulties being the oldest sibling, how we would get up at all hours of the night/morning to watch "foreign" football. It was quite pleasant. Of course, this entire time I am still remembering that I am still in my pajamas and bra-less, so again, pleasant as it was, still super, super awkward. Sigh.

Before he left, we joked about how we clearly had nothing to hide, so that was good. He mentioned that he's find out about how to replace our burnt microwave (don't ask) and then, before he left, he mentioned that I should tell my sister to tidy her room. I said tell me about it and showed him out the door.

So then, I have to rush to get out of the house to make it down to the Gloucester Green market to see if I can find some good veggies and possibly some bread for the next few days. I've been on a running kick lately- I've run the last five out of six days so I thought it might be nice to run the 1.7 miles down to Gloucester Green and just bring a backpack with a change of clothes for when I got to work. I was out of the house for literally two minutes when it started to rain. That forced a quick decision- do I just bag it and go home to change or do I just keep going and hope that it stops raining soon. I decided for the latter and kept running but the rain did not let up. It wasn't pouring, thank goodness, but by the time I made it down to the Green, I really was looking well on my way to a wet-t-shirt contest. Worst part...? White t-shirt.... yep. I walked through the GG Market with my arms folded over my chest and my back slightly hunched. Next embarrassment was the fact that I didn't realize til I arrived that Gloucester Green market on Wed and Thurs is NOT a food market. Lots of cool antiques but this revelation prompted a run to the Covered Market for some peppers, strawberries (first of the season!) and baby cucumbers... oh, and some super fresh bread from Nan's Bakery. I was still wet so I stopped to get a small hot chocolate to warm myself up since, for some mental reason, I decided to bring a tank top with me, instead of a sweater. So that was dumb. Luckily I changed with no problems and that marked the end of my slightly embarrassing on various levels day.

Hope you enjoyed my frequent chagrin :)

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