BQOTD

Youval: Why do I have know the Hebrew alphabet in order?

Michal: Why do you have to know the English alphabet in order?

Youval: For filing!

Jim Spear: So what is an example of a bad change?

7th grader: It's like when that one angel, I can't remember his name, fell and became the devil.

Jim Spear: Well... um... yes... but I'm looking for something a little more on our level...

This is why...

... I love Colin Firth.

"Sixty minutes has discovered that I have no shame. I am a drag queen."

This man can go from this...

To this...

How can you not be madly in love?

Turtle

I wasn't going to post this but then I watched it and couldn't resist.... man, remember when TV shows were decent? Yes, I know the acting isn't Emmy winning, but it's certainly better than the junk that's on today.

Subbing Second Grade

On Thursday, I took a job in a second grade classroom. Totally out of my realm, right? Actually it wasn't too bad! Once you look past them correcting you every two seconds, they were actually quite fun! The best part was that I got to read a ton with them. We couldn't find their usual afternoon Read-Aloud book so I took matters in to my own hand and we read "The Enormous Crocdile" by the incredible Roald Dahl. They absolutely loved it. I got to read in voices and accents and they recited parts of it along with me and guessed what was happening next. It was a blast.

I will say this for second-graders. They are cute. The certainly tug at your heartstrings. I mean, let's be real, if you have low-self-esteem, work with second graders. Maybe I should have gotten on this train earlier. Although not really.... as lovely as this note was and all the hugs I got, even as a sub, I certainly couldn't work with the little ones day-in and day-out. Oy.

I did love seeing all the books in this teacher's classroom though. It brought back so many memories of my childhood book loves. First of all, the Polk Street Kids. Emily Arrow with her four braids and bows. Richard Beast Best who was held back a year. Matthew who wet the bed and always eat peanut butter and fluffer-nutter sandwiches (I had NO IDEA what fluffer-nutter was back then). Dawn with the pencil box. All the adventures they went on. So many memories.

Oh my goodness, My Father's Dragon was one of my favorite books growing up. It follows the story of the narrator's father who goes to an island to rescue a yellow and blue striped dragon. Along the way, his wonderful wits keep him safe. I loved the illustrations in this book, they highlighted so well what was going on in the text. Plus, two great sequels with the same great illustrations. Read these immediately if you haven't.

And my my word, guys, did you know that this was a real thing? They made a TV SHOW out of Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle? With Jean Stapleton? And Joan Cusack? And Eg Begley, Jr.? I don't even have words to describe this! It's like a cartoon but with live-people. Just look at the costumes! Look at the pots/cans of make-up on the vanity table. They look like they were taken from Winnie-the-Pooh! "Baby Bean, bathe thyself!"- I love this. Also, I'm intrigued by their speech- it's very intelligent. What seven-year old says "I won't be a party to it"? I had totally forgotten than Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle lived in an upside-down house. Way to stick to the original story, random production company. But I don't remember her having a talking/sneezing tree. And who is this awful reporter man? Norbert? Definitely do not remember him. I don't think that anyone but Jean Stapleton could have played Mrs. Piggle-Wiggle. PLEASE take the time to watch this- it's amazing.

Also, did you know that they made a TV show out of the Fudge Books? I was such a huge fan of these- maybe it was because my sisters as a whole reminded me of Fudge? I won't confess to that being true or not but I definitely empathized greatly with Peter Hatcher. There are a couple of places in these books that make me just die with laughter. The part in "Fudge-A-Mania" where the folding bed snaps up and closes on Fudge? Fall-off-the-bed laugh so hard.

And speaking of books that make you laugh so hard that you want to die, has anyone ever read the Anastasia books? If you haven't, RUN, don't walk, to your nearest library and check these gems out for you. Anastasia is an intelligent yet awkward twelve-year old with many dreams. She wants to be a writer, makes loads of lists, makes friends, wants to become a model, sometimes dates equally awkward Steve Harvey, gets a little brother named Sam, and gets into many scrapes. I absolutely adore her parents, Myron and Katherine. Each book is incredible and honest and funny and I just live for Anastasia's conversations with her parents. Plus, there are two great books about Sam, just for extra kicks.

Funny how one day spent with super-cute second graders leads you down memory lane!

Fabulous and Famous!

One of my favorite events of JAM is Oscar Night. The girls get dressed up in gorgeous dresses, the boys get dressed up in suits and ties and cute outfits and we all get to walk the Red Carpet. We go into a gorgeous room with food (this year we had cookies and cupcakes, popcorn and licorice and of course, a chocolate fountain!) and decorations and a big screen.

Each group got to debut their feature film. This year we got to see "March of the Penguins", "Tangled", "Enchanted", "Titanic", "Most Boring Man in the World", "Snow White", and "Spaceballs". Each was hilarious and ridiculous and snort-inducing and creative in their own way. There was some great dubbing, excellent costumes, marvelous choreography, dancing and singing, animal co-stars, action, drama, light sabers and eerily similar sets in several of the movies....

Of course, Best Actor and Actress as well as Best Supporting Actor and Actress were crowned and there was a massive clean-up job at the end. Nothing less than that for the infamous JAM Oscars! I felt so blessed being around such fabulous movie stars!

If You're Going to Go to San Diego...

.... you might as well do it the proper way!

A few weeks ago, Michael and I drove down to San Diego in his mom's convertible. It was my first time legitimately driving in a convertible and it was a blast! We had no traffic on the way down which was rare and lovely. We met up with Mariah at Pat and Oscars, our usual go-to place. We had a great time catching up, as well as an hour at the house Mariah was staying at for awhile, before heading back up the coast to Irvine.

I always have a blast with Michael and the convertible made it even better! Let's do this again next time (as long as we continue to go to Pat and Oscars!)

Side-note.... this also made a great entrance for Oscar Night, pulling up in a convertible!

20 Statements

1. You end up looking/sounding like a schizophrenic if you try to have a conversation/pretty much do anything while listening to what's going on over the headset you are wearing.

2. Beethoven hated sopranos and double basses but the man was still a bloody genius.

3. Butterscotch candies are actually quite delicious (sorry Shiri)

4. I am kind of infatuated right now with the Mitfords and also kind of wish I was in their family. I wonder what I would have ended up being? Communist like Jessica? Fascist like Unity or Diana? A chicken farmer and farm manager like Pamela? Shot in the chest like Tom? A flip-floper like Nancy? Or a Duchess like Deborah? Or maybe I would have shocked everyone and run for Parliament...

5. Unity Valkyrie Mitford was conceived in the town of Swastika, Ontario in Canada. She later went on to be a passionate if not slightly obsessed member of the Nazi Party and a near-stalker of Hitler. If that is not foreshadowing, I'm not sure what is.

6. I sort of with that I had pets like Harold, Chester and Howie. Well, only to some extent... Chester is a little crazy.

7. The back of my legs itch like MAD because they were sunburned a week ago. I'm in misery, and not in the fun Maroon 5 song kind of way.

8. If you don't care enough to leave sub plans (and really, unless you are on your deathbed, you can email/call something in- this is the era of smart phones), then I probably don't care enough to make your kids do work.

9. I'm sorry, do kids go to high school this day or hoochie-clothing school. Because I'm appalled at what kids wear these days.

10. Are there people out there who don't give a rat's tail about the NBA finals? If so, please let me know. I'd like to be their friend.

11. My commitment to subbing is either strengthened or weakened when I hear the school and the grade the job is for. I'm been avoiding elementary school positions- I don't know if I"m suited for that. I would have no idea what to do with them 95% of the time.

12. I'm going camping on the beach this weekend and I'm totally stoked. I also just realized that I'm waaaayyyyy behind on pictures for my blog and that will be remedied tomorrow if I don't have a job.

13. I've completely caught up on RSC Podcasts. I'm not quite sure what to do with myself anymore.

14. Oh did I cry when (spoiler alert!) Tosh and Owen died on Torchwood. Ugh, I was finally growing fond of Owen too!

15. I just read the synopsis for this new show this summer on NBC. Love in the Wild (NBC)

It's like speed-dating in the jungle. Twenty men and women are paired off and dropped into a Costa Rican jungle with only a map and each other to navigate through various challenges. At day's end, winners will be treated to romantic dates, after which they'll choose whether to remain together or try a new partner for the next task. Um, I'm sorry but a) ridiculous premise and b) what is this, Amazing Race meets the Bachelor? Ugh.

16. Then I read this: The Lying Game (ABC Family) Foster child Emma (Alexandra Chando) learns she has an identical twin sister, Sutton, who was adopted by a wealthy family. The sisters trade places while Sutton pursues a lead on the identity of their birth mother. So basically the Prince and the Pauper. Way to steal for Mark Twain ABC Family.

17. The conclusion about the previous two statements is that summer TV sucks and I will be sticking to my Netflix queue and my books/books on CD (and maybe Psych and White Collar, duh...)

18. The new face cream that I got a few months ago SUCKS compares to the one I got last year in Oxford. SUCKS!!!!!! Even though it's the same brand. SUCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

19. I really like everything to do with books. Free books. Book stores. Book clubs. Big books. Little books. Kids books. Adult books. Books on tape. If it's a book, I'm probably a fan of at least something.

20. If I don't end up getting a job tomorrow, I"m going to the pool. Maybe all day. The end.